A perfect ending...

April 23,2005. A beautiful Spring day 9 months in the making. Todd took my picture the night before by the Rhododendron for a belly picture for what would be my last pregnancy and he took it right on time since I went into labor later that night. I had had 2 episodes of preterm labor where I went in thinking I was in labor only to be told to go home, I wasn't ready to deliver yet. I had never been so frustrated. I had been having contractions all day on the 22, but nothing that was regular or made me think this was finally it. I went to bed late, after Todd, and when I laid down the contractions started. Strongly enough to make me breathe through them every 5 minutes. I laid there for an hour timing them when I finally decided I needed to wake Todd up and call the doctor. They immediately told me to come in---after yelling at me for not calling sooner. What? They were immediately 5 minutes apart. I wasn't calling unless I knew for sure.-- so we called Heather and Justin to meet us at the hospital. Again. I knew this time would be different, though. We had to wake the poor boys up and load them into the car and arrived at the hospital at 12:15am.

Dr. Benson came into the room and examined me and informed us that we were staying and then asked if I wanted an epidural. One 1/2 hour later, I was resting comfortably and awaiting the arrival of our third little one, gender as of yet unknown.

I tried to rest and did sleep occasionally in between checks from the nurse and pitocin hook-ups and Dr. Benson's final check before Dr. Harris came on(yay!). I was 6cm at 6:00am, so we though we had awhile to wait.

Dr. Harris arrived at 7:15 and decided she would change clothes, break my bag, do rounds and then check back in. She started all this at about 7:45. Around 8:00 or so, my epidural line came dislodged, so I paged my nurse to come take a look since I couldn't see behind me. In the mean time, I felt another gush of water when I changed positions. My nurse came in at the same time as Dr. Harris, around 8:10-8:15, and while the RN fixed my epidural line, Dr. Harris tried to check my progress. However, when she went to do so, she found the baby's head right there. And then the scramble begun. Dr. Harris rushed to get changed, and the nurse prepped the baby's isolette.

At 8:20, Dr. Harris told me to give a little push, so I literally coughed the baby's head out...no big pushes, just a teeny cough. When the head was delivered, I gave another gentle push to deliver the shoulders at which point Dr. Harris told me to grab the baby and help to deliver it. After the baby was out, Dr. Harris held it up and said, "well, tell us what it is." I looked and it took me a second to realize there was NO PENIS! "Oh, my God! Forrest, we have a little girl. Oh, my God! It's a girl", were my exact words. Lauren Christine was delivered at 8:25 on April 23,2005, weighing in at 7-12 and 19 1/4". What a miracle.



What kind of baby was LC? So, different from her brothers, that's for sure. She was the most laid back baby, that whenever someone asked if she was a "good baby", I was afraid to answer for fear of jinxing us. She never cried, unless she was wet or hungry. She was so happy and so mellow, it was hard to believe. She loved her brothers, right from the start.

She followed all the milestones, but was a little peanut of a thing. She was still in 6-9 month clothes at her one year birthday, and didn't walk until she was 14 months old. She closely resembles Henry, but at other times favors Wyatt. Some say she looks like me, but i don't see it too much.



What a pistol she became in her second year, though. Smart as a whip and what a personality. It is still hard for me to believe, at times, that we have such a precious little girl in our lives. What a ray of sunshine she is and is still in love with her brothers. If she is awake, then they need to be, too. When they are at school, she is asking to pick them up. She follows them around, especially Henry, like a little groupie. She is fiercely independent, yet a complete mama's girl. She loves shoes and wearing new clothes, yet getting dirty in the mud. She is the perfect little girl, IMO. Just enough girlie-girl mixed with the ability to hold her own.

Lauren, you are the perfect ending to our little family. You complete us like no one else could and I am so, so grateful that I have the privilege of watching you grow up. I can not wait for the years to come and so hope that we have the same special relationship then that we do now, pretty girl. I love you.

I'm going back to bed...

We had a rough morning, today. It is snowing up a literal storm which means that Wyatt needed his snow gear for school today. Unfortunately, he couldn't find his hat right when we were trying to leave. His hat is always supposed to be with his gloves so that we can grab them and go without a production of finding things, so, to say I was a little annoyed is an understatement. I hate lost things. It drives me nuts when items go missing, especially when we are rushing and I am stressed about driving in snow.

He kept insisting that he left it on his seat in the van but it wasn't anywhere to be found and he was just standing there arguing with me about it, when I yelled at him to either find it or he's going to school without it. He started crying and then yelled, YOU ARE BEING MEAN It stopped me in my tracks. I then went inside and checked the kitchen and his room, and there it was on his bed. I handed it to him and then got in the car and started driving to school. I apologized for yelling, again. I really need to find a way to stop that.

The roads were freaking horrible, as they always are out here, and I was gripping the wheel when I looked in the back seat and noticed LC wasn't buckled in. In the ruckus of finding Wyatt's hat, I had forgotten to latch her in her car seat, so I pulled over and buckled her in and then had a hard time pulling out of the snow back onto the road. We got Wyatt to school right when he needed to be there, so I headed home instead of going to Debi's to help set up for the garage sale. The roads are just too bad to go over there, right now.

On the way home, I started to slide at one point, so I slowed down which made the stupid SUV in back of me start to tailgate, which made me more nervous. However, we passed 3 cars in the ditch so they decided to back off after they saw that.

I am now home, watching The Wiggles---after I cleaned off the satellite--and I am not leaving until this stupid snow stops.

Is the week over yet?

It's only Tuesday and I am feeling extremely overwhelmed. We have to go to Debi and Richard's today to help set up for the garage sale I am doing with Debi on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. I also have to go tomorrow to help, as well. Tomorrow night, Henry has Daddy Dinosaur Night and Wyatt has his first baseball practice. Thursday is the first day of the sale, so Todd has to swing by Debi's to pick up LC before he picks up Henry from school. Friday will be the sale, again, while I figure out what I am doing with Henry and LC for the afternoon. Saturday is the last day of the sale, while Henry has swimming, Wyatt has baseball AND swimming. LC will be hanging with me, again.

I, admittedly, don't do well with routine changes and it wreaks havoc on the kids which stresses me out even more. I am so hoping that things go smoothly and that this garage sale proves to be worth the effort.

Good friends and Good God...

Yesterday, LC, Henry and I went to my very, very good friend Andi's house for a playdate and to meet her new baby, Grace, who is only 7 weeks old. Mason and Henry played wonderfully together because of their common obsession with Star Wars and LC was happy playing with the baby stuff. I was a little worried about LC and the baby because she has never been around one before and she can be-oh, who am I kidding, she is--a mama's girl. As I was holding Gracie and trying to burp her, LC came over and started doing the same things to her I was doing--patting her back, rubbing her back, tapping her bum. Whatever I did, she did and she was soooo gentle. It struck me yesterday as it was happening, but I think I buried the feeling. Today it resurfaced, which brings us to the "Good God" moment.

I am sad that we are not going to have any more babies. Not because I want more, but because LC is the last one. She won't have a little sister. She won't get to be a big sister. I won't get to see her nurturing a baby like I saw Henry and Wyatt do. She is the baby of the family and it makes me sad to realize that and makes me second guess just a teensy bit the decision to be done. I know deep down that we are, but it still gives me little pangs at the strangest times. There is a light at the end of the tunnel that I can't deny, though. With LC getting older, we are feeling so much more freedom and making plans that we haven't been able to in 7 years, so it solidifies the decision. I am just disappointed for her, at times, that she won't have a sister.

Just some random thoughts.

Thunder storms...

Last night we had some horrible storms come through that were loud and electric. At about 2:15, little footsteps could be heard coming into our room. A little voice tells us that it is really loud and bright outside. We tell him that it's o.k. and nothing to worry about and let's go back to bed. He tears off running before I can even get up, so I follow him to his room to check on him. He is curled up on his bed in a teeny fetal position and is fighting back tears. I cover him up and then sit next to him and rub his back, all the while telling him that everything is o.k., the thunder and lightning can't hurt him and to not be afraid. I sit with him for a few minutes to make sure he is calm and almost asleep, remembering my own fear of thunderstorms as a kid. I was so terrified of them I would wake up my little sister to come get in bed with me, so, I didn't want to leave him alone too soon knowing he shares the same fears.

I am exhausted today, but it is worth it knowing I calmed Henry's fears last night.